Sunday, September 13, 2009

Foot Fault


List of Perkins' Childrens' Transgressions
on their First Day of Spanish School

1. Loosening shoe.  Clark was reprimanded for loosening his shoe to relieve a blister forming on his heel.  Apparently, there is a rule against shoe adjustments.  A full shoe removal warrants a detention.  I'm not kidding ... fall-out from the shoe bomber?

2. Being an American.  Lucia's teacher started the first morning of school with a warning to the class that she would not tolerate cheating like the Americans.  "All Americans cheat." She also warned that she would confiscate all students' drugs.

3. Choosing a different seat on the bus.  Clark, notorious for his car sickness, had the audacity to change his seat from the back to the front of the bus.  Telling the bus monitor that he was going to throw up did not stop the barrage of Spanish reprimands.

4. Being late for class.  Fair enough.  Sam received his first detention ever for being late (with a group of his new friends) to class after lunch.  With no bell ringing, no watch, and no idea when he's supposed to be back in class, he may get more.  Trouble is, he didn't learn the term "detention" in Spanish to know that he'd received a detention.  So, he missed it.

5. Not reciting Catholic prayers (in Spanish).  Clark again.  When asked by his teacher why he wasn't participating in religion "class" (He says it was a Catholic mass), Clark replied that since he is neither Catholic, nor Spanish, he doesn't know the prayers.  And if he did, he wouldn't be able to recite them in Spanish.  Not knowing Spanish is tolerated in some classes, but not in religion.

3 comments:

Mental P Mama said...

Lord. Have. Mercy. This makes my stomach hurt in sympathy.

Anonymous said...

i think it was a great decision to do this to your kids. still think it was a big miss to not sign up the reality show folks......you guys could have made some steak money

Anonymous said...

Ahh falshbacks to my childhood. Although it was Iowa and we didn't speak Spanish. The detention, the tardiness, and the God squad keeping the man down all ring a familiar bell. My advice, just start asking for fogiveness, Catholics like that.